Lotus Chen
Sometimes, I have strange thoughts, for example that people who don't have a nice and loving family tend to like traveling. Exploring the outside world is indeed wonderful, but if you have a complete and happy family, family is of course the most comfortable harbor a person can rely on and heal wounds. I've been away from home for a year and I feel so homesick. However, I stay at home for just a week, I want to leave. Maybe because I do not have a bedroom at home. All the rooms in my parents' house are given to my brother 's family. Every time I go home, I feel strongly that I must have my own private space outside my parents’ house, and I must live my own life very well. American children also leave their parents and live separately when they grow up. I do not know whether they treat their daughters and sons differently or not. But many Chinese parents prefer sons to daughters, which makes daughters feel unequal and unfair. During last summer vacation, my aunt took me to her house to play. She lived in the city and had her own family after she got married. They drove me back home in the evening. When we arrive at our hometown (her parents’ house), she and her husband left without even getting out of the car after I arrived at home. My aunt explained to me, “A married daughter is like spilled water from their parents’ family to her husband’s family. Don't go back to your parents' house too often so that others will gossip.” In our small hometown, men never have to grow up and never stay away from home, but women can't.
During the time at home, I have seen several very old American movies recently at home, including “The Age of Innocence”（1993）and “Little Women”（1994）. The former tells about a man who cannot get married to the woman he loves. As years passed by, he got married, had children and children grew up. After his wife died, he also had gray hair. One day, he figured out that the only other person who knows his love secret is his wife. Finally, he decided not to meet his lover though he desired to meet her for many years. The movie seems to imply that who is with whom is destined. If you chose the woman you got married to, don't regret it. For the latter movie, Joe in “Little Women” is whom I resonate with most. Some people say that the most beautiful and strong person in this movie is the mother, who is alone and busy with four daughters. She told Joe, you have so many talents and skills, you will be unhappy if you do not go out to adventure. She encouraged Joe to go to Europe and New York City to pursue her dream as a writer. Her lover, a German professor, inspired her to write stories about herself and her life, and later she wrote the novel “Little Women”. The American older generation’s values during the economic depression and in war are still very beautiful. How optimistic, generous and positive they are! Do young people in the United States still believe in these values? (It reminds me of my observation when I was riding along the coast of Monterey Peninsula; I occasionally saw similar classic and historic TV series through their windows in several houses with ocean view. Do the wealthy Americans living in this area miss the good old days in early 20 century?) Are they, like me, watching the Chinese costume films（Qing dynasty soap operas）while criticizing backward feudal ideas they disseminate? Before going to bed one night, I watched "Round Table"-- a Chinese talk show hosted by my former upperclassman Dou Wentao. His guest is one of my favorite writer Yan Geling who lives overseas. The show provoked me to think---Although a well-known writer’s life is enviable and full of freedom, the price of freedom is extreme self-discipline. Can you do it?
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